Four and a Half Years

A few days ago, Jess, Jaun and myself started talking about men and how it is that when you are single and looking to date someone, you always seem to fall for Mr. Wrong. Well not all of us and not all the time but the majority of the time that is the case. So I wanted their perspective on that and what they think is the governing factor  that makes you decide who to date.

Now first we have to just stipulate the three categories of men, as per the two them.

1. The Nice Guy

This is the man that will do anything for you. He will treat you like a Queen and make your every day as special as what he can. He will never lift a hand or raise his voice. He will always be there for you no matter what happens. In short he is a spineless doormat.

2. The Bad Boy

Everyone likes him and wants to be with him. He might not always be the sexiest man around but he is risqué and takes chances. You know he will break your heart. You know he will cheat on you and he might even abuse you and its gonna hurt like hell when he dumps you.

3. The Perfect Man

This type of man is a gentle mixture of both of the above categories. He allows you to have your own life and freedom with your own friends and you can do what you like. To a point. Then he lets you know he is not happy. He pretty much knows how to control his partner so that you don’t get completely out of hand and even though he gives you freedom he is not a spineless doormat. But this man apparently does not exist according to Jess and Jaun.

For the remainder of this blog I will refer to each type of man as number 1, 2 or 3. I wanted to know from them why it is that even when you know that it is gonna end badly with 2, you still go for him. Yes I understand that no one want to date a wimp either.

Personally I believe that 3 is real and that I have a 3.

Yes I am the luckiest boy alive.

You see Paul pretty much just goes with whatever. The best way I can describe the two of us is the following.

Vivi Abbott Walker

I am Vivi Abbott Walker and he is Shepard James ‘Shep’ Walker. For those of you that has watched ‘Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood’ you will understand. For those that has not watched it, let me explain. 

I am  a crazy bitch that flies off the handle. I get bright ideas in the middle of the night, and then it has to be done then. I am impulsive like you have never seen. If I wanna do something, I will do it now. If I want something, then I want it now! Its not that I am spoilt. We grew up very poor, my mama did not have a lot te give as we grew up. But that is probably why I am this way. Paul on the other hand just lets me do whatever the fucq I want to.Of course the fact that he movie plays off in the south of America with that wonderful Louisiana accent, does help. I just love that Southern accent.

Shep Walker

And then when ever I step over that line of ‘now you have gone too far’ he just makes it very clear that it wont carry on. Don’t get me wrong. I push my luck and see how far I can push it, but the fact that he does step in and take charge is really so very sexy. I also know that if the shit does hit the fan and I cannot (for which ever reason) be the control freak that I normally am, he will take charge and sort things out. I have to be honest that it is such an awesome feeling to know that I am taken care of.

Today we are together for four and a half years. I remember the day that we met at Cape Town International Airport. I was so nervous that he wouldn’t like me. My Bethal guy. We have been through so much together and we have faced every obstacle head on, always holding hands. One of the best things about our relationship is the fact that we can talk. About serious things and just weird shit. We laugh at each other and when he laughs that dimple shows. That dimple that won my heart.

Four and a half years later and my tummy still does flip flops when we kiss. My leg still lifts a little off of the ground. He still has  the most beautiful face I have ever seen. He is still the one that makes my heart race at speeds that I didn’t think is possible and I still think that the best way to sleep is in his arm. There is no better pillow in the world.

A lot of people thinks that it is fucqed up, but when he phones me, there is a personalized ringtone just for him. I got it from Star Trek and will post the video here. And as corny or stupid as what it may sound. It is still the truth.

I look forward to the 13^th of July when we get Handfasted and after that I look forward to the rest of my life!!

Mwah!!

P.S. In my mind, I typed this blog in a Southern accent. Wonder how many of yall read it like that?