Perceptions of the Youth

I remember when I was a kid of 4 or 5, the simple facts about my grandparents. (Goddess bless both their souls) My Granny was a big woman with perfect Jensens Violet hair that was styled as a dome around her hair. If anyone was available in the house you would have to stand behind her with the comb and make sure there were no "holes" in her hair, as she called it. All granny did, just about the entire day was to make food. My Grandfather was an austere an strict man in his coat and tie and worked as the chartered accountant for the district municipality. An extremely intelligent man that could not be beaten at chess. 

But one thing that I will never forget about them is their bedroom. As you walked in they had matching cupboards that was separated by a mirror piece that had a drawer.  As you come in on the right, by the door was commode, even though the water closet was right next to their bedroom. They slept on separate beds divided by a bedside table. The beds were covered in matching quilts that had a pink/peach colour, pattern on top and pleats hanging down the sides. This would be slightly tucked underneath the first pillow and folded over the second (top) pillow so that it seemed that the bed and pillows were all one single unit.  Then at night when they go to bed the quilt would be removed as well as one of the pillows so that they only sleep on one pillow. I never understood this and always just thought that maybe that is what old people do.

Our Bedding

So about a week ago we are getting ready for bed. We take of the Continental pillows. The three scatter cushions. Fold up the quilt and take one of the sleeping pillows off so we only have one pillow each and as I am getting into bed a single thought dawns on me.

“I have turned into my grandmother”

Granted we sleep on a queen size bed and not two separate beds and our bedding is not pink/peach but black and grey with lots of sequence and embroidery and diamante but the thought was there.

I then allowed myself to carry on with that train of thought and just started thinking back. When I was young I used to think that antiques were meant as memories for people who are in fact themselves antique. Well today I love antiques and one of my most prized ones is the phone I have in my lounge. It is an old post office phone that only has a receiver you pick up. No buttons to dial, no lever to turn, nothing. It is so old that the writing on it states that it is still the Union of South Africa. Way before the Republic days.

Hydrangeas

Plants, well as a kid this was an old people hobby. My granny had in front of her bedroom window a row of blue, purple and pink Hydrangeas. At the gate she had Malva’s which I always thought stank. By the formal lounge window was a Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow. Of course there was lots of other plants as well but that is what always stood out to me from the front garden and at the back I remember the damn Guava Tree that we always had to clean up after and her small herb garden that was over run with Petroselinum.  I didn’t care much for the garden and today I love plants. I am so happy that after a more than a year my Japanese Peace Lilly is finally getting her first flower. The Cycads are getting new leaves and my daisy seeds are growing. Yes I have lots more plants like my granny used to have including Petroselinum.

Petroselinum

Not that I am an old person, but as I am getting older I enjoy the entertainment of my own home more. I don’t like going to the movies. I wake up early on a Sunday to go to the shops before they get busy as the malls annoy me. I dislike ques of people and sending me into a bank is hell, you may as well kill me. I am using skin care products and drinking 4 different pills every morning. This is besides for the alkaline powder and megan pulv. If I was a 4 year old boy looking at myself now I would be thinking that I am really old. 

I have decided this is the year that I prepare myself for my coming birthday, cuz life begins at 30. Have a blast but also make sure that you got all your ducks in a row for one day. And yes if that sounds responsible and old person like to you young kids. Let me just say a few things.

1.   None of you can ever replace me. You might take someones place but it aint gonna be mine, so follow this you bitches.

2.    I can legally buy smokes and booze and porn

3.  I am allowed entry to all the interesting places that you are busy discovering  and still are not allowed into.

4.    If you start getting tits or if your natural tits start to sag, I will point and laugh at your stress and hand you the granny panties. Mine of course will have sequence on them by then.

So keeping all that in mind I am ending this blog with a poem.

Warning - When I Am an Old Woman I Shall Wear Purple

By Jenny Joseph

When I am an old woman, I shall wear purple

with a red hat that doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.

And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves

and satin candles, and say we've no money for butter.

I shall sit down on the pavement when I am tired

and gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells

and run my stick along the public railings

and make up for the sobriety of my youth.

I shall go out in my slippers in the rain

and pick the flowers in other people's gardens

and learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat

and eat three pounds of sausages at a go

or only bread and pickles for a week

and hoard pens and pencils and beer nuts and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry

and pay our rent and not swear in the street

and set a good example for the children.

We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?

So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised

When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Mwah!